Rejection Hurts

As I was Googling “Christianity” and “Church” recently, I stumbled across www.RejectionHurts.com, “an online community where people can share their personal stories of how they felt unwanted or alienated by organized religion.”

The site is produced by the United Church of Christ and includes all sorts of testimonies from the Church-Burned.

One post reads…
“…one Sunday, my mother convinced me to go to church with her. Everything was fine until the sermon. It was about the ’signs of death in the church’. According to the sermon, the worst was divorce and that those that divorce are going to hell. I was furious. I had done nothing wrong, and I was being told I was going to hell. I turned to my mother, told her I was leaving and would never again set foot in that church…”

Another says…
“…we attended a loving church for over a decade, but when the congregation discovered my homosexuality, I noticed that I had begun to become somewhat segregated from the rest of the church community, and when the clergy began distributing propaganda about the “detestable wickedness” of homosexuals, and similar literature that was blatantly homophobic and hateful to lesbians and gays, I simply quit going to church and over a year I had adopted a rage-filled, agnostic approach to God and religion…”

I love the idea of this website and the tone it takes. However, after reading quite a few of the posts, I realized that almost all of the stories resolved with a “and then I found the UCC Church!” happy ending.

Now, I can’t fault UCC for this evangelism tactic. In fact, I think it’s in pretty good taste. But what I love about my own website, www.ChurchRater.com (shameless self-promotion here!) is that we’re not run by a church and we don’t demand happy endings. We acknowledge that for many, many (too many) people, the “church experience” ends with wounding and bitterness.

Reality isn’t always rosey and I GUARANTEE there is no church or denomination that has found “The Answer” to not hurting people.

I’d encourage you to check out www.RejectionHurts.com and think about what is and is not affective or valuable for seekers and those in spiritual recovery…


please read more about my thoughts on the evolution of Christianity at www.emergingchristianity.blogspot.com